רפואת הנפש ורפואת הגוף

The nusach of the tefilla for a choleh is רפואת הנפש ורפואת הגוף,  Recently, I've been saying the tefilla for a friend, and I was curious.  What does it mean רפואת הנפש ?  Bishlema if you're davening for a person with mental problems, or depression, I understand the tefilla.  But if someone has the flu, or is having surgery, or just had a baby, what does  רפואת הנפש have to do with the tefilla?  I didn't see anyone that talks about it, so until I do, here are some approaches.

UPDATE:
We all instinctively feel that the the nusach reflects some kind of relationship between the two kinds of illness, but it's hard to nail down exactly what that relationship is.
Avrohom (no last name) brought in the Ramban about Ani Hashem rof'echa, and I rejected the comparison, because the Ramban is just saying that if you are a tzadik gamur, Hashem will do nissim and keep you healthy.   Abbie Jakubovic referred to the Rambam, who in several places deals with Choli HaNefesh as an illness that needs refuah no less than physical illness. I initially did not believe that the Rambam was relevant.  
But then Michael (no last name) sent us to the Maharsha in Shabbos 67a, and the Maharsha is exactly what we were looking for.  The Maharsha also brings Abbie's Rambam, and develops it beyond what I saw in the Rambam's words. I also am starting to wonder if Avrohom's Ramban is indeed relating spirituality and physical ailments, beyond a general l'maalah miderech hateva.
Yasher kochachem.  Very satisfying to have a Maharsha that is clear and exactly on point!   (I'm still not sure whether the Maharsha is only bringing the Rambam as a starting point, or he held that the Rambam had the Maharsha's approach in mind as well, but that does not really matter.)  
The Maharsha, verbatim, has been added toward the end of this post.

-We just received two excellent remarks from Refoel NJ (no last name) which have also been added at the end of the post, after the Maharsha.

All in all, the explanations are so good that I'm beginning to wonder why the standard nusach of Refa'einu in Shmoneh Esrei does not use this expression. 


1.  From my father-in-law shlitah, Harav Reuven Feinstein:
Basically, he said that refuah is refuah, and just like in Havdala we mention all kinds of havdala, and in Birkas HaMazon we thank Hashem for everything besides the food we ate, so, too, when we ask the Ribono shel Olam for one kind of refuah, we should ask for a bracha for all kinds of refuah.
In more detail- In Megilla 17 it brings Yeshaya 6:10

השמן לב העם הזה ואזניו הכבד ועיניו השע פן יראה בעיניו ובאזניו ישמע ולבבו יבין ושב ורפא לו 

and says that the words ורפא לו don't mean physical healing, they mean slicha.  The Maharsha says that the Gemara is learning ושב ורפא לו as meaning רפואת הנפש.  So my shver said that since the word רפואה in Tanach can mean either רפואת הנפש or רפואת הגוף, when we are mispallel for one kind of refuah we are also mispallel for the other kind of refuah.  (This has nothing to do with Reb Meir in Brachos 10a, because here you're just asking for selicha, not necessarily that the person should do teshuva.)

2.  I said that in Nedarim 40a it brings from Tehillim 41

 ה' ישמרהו ויחיהו ואשר בארץ ואל תתנהו בנפש איביו

 and explains that the Ribono shel Olam should be mazmin friends for him that give him healthful and beneficial advice, as was the case with נעמן who was cured by taking the advice of אלישע, and not the kind of foolish and destructive friends such as רחבעם had.  From this Gemara you see that the word נפש means advice that can either help or destroy.  If so, the tefilla is that the choleh should have friends that give him wise and healthful advice that will enable him to have a - רפואת הגוף- his friends will guard him and give him life with their good advice and care.

3.  My son, Harav Mordechai Eisenberg, said that when we are mispallel for a choleh, we ask for him as one among all the cholei yisrael. There are, unfortunately,  both cholei hanefesh and cholei haguf in that group, and when we are mispallel for refuah for cholim, they are all the same, they all need the same rachmei Hashem for a refuah shleimah. So we use a nusach that is appropriate for all of the cholim.  This is similar to #1, from his grandfather.

4. My nephew, Harav Geilan Grant, directs our attention to the Magen Avraham. The Magen Avraham in 6:4, and see the Machatzis Hashekel there, brings from the Kisvei haAri zal that every food comprises gashmiyus and ruchniyus, the combination being vital to the sustenance of the human being, who similarly  embodies both elements.  If so, we can say that every physical affliction involves a similar infirmity in the corresponding spiritual aspect, and we ask for a refuah sheleima that cures both.
This is not limited to the Gemora in Shabbos 55 that suffering is proof of of עוון,  because even יסורים של אהבה, I think, would qualify as refuah hanefesh. Otherwise,  it would be inappropriate impute sin to your friend.  Also, I don't  think it's appropriate to approach the Ribono shel Olam to say that your friend is a sinner but please forgive him.

As with anything from the Arizal, I am ignorant of all beyond the literal meaning of what I see brought down.

5.  Several friends, including R' Duddy Maler and Rav Yitzchak Resnick.
There is no wall between the physical and the mental/spiritual. When a man suffers physically, his "nefesh" suffers as well, and that can involve spiritual and emotional affliction. Sometimes, the secondary problem lingers long after the primary problem has ended. Additionally, spiritual and emotional intervention can be enormously therapeutic- music, visits of a sympathetic friend, even something as trivial as petting an animal. A refuas hanefesh can be the key to refuas haguf.  
Please see below for updates.

6.  THE MAHARSHA. (Yasher koach to Michael (no last name))
Abaya in Shabbos on 67a prescribes a cure for a certain fever that involves doing things and saying some pesukim, pesukim whose connotation can mean a diminishment of heat. The Maharsha says the following:

לאישתא צמירתא כו' ולימא וירא מלאך ה' גו' ולימא ויאמר משה אסורה גו' כו' יש לכוון בזה שנקטו ג' פסוקים הללו לרפואות חולי זה הוא מבואר כמ"ש הרמב"ם בשמונה פרקים דרפואות הנפש הם כעין רפואות הגופות וכמ"ש ושמתם נמשלה התורה לסם משל לאדם שיש לו מכה הניח עליה רטייה כו' בראתי יצ"ה בראתי לו תבלין שהיא התורה וחולי הגופות חולה כחולי הנפש כמ"ש בכמה מקומות בפרט בתוכחה והוא ענין הכתוב והיה אם שמוע תשמע גו' שהיא התורה רפואת הנפש אז כל המחלה גו' לא אשים גו' מסיים כי אני ה' רופאך דהיינו שנתתי לך רטייה ותבלין שהיא התורה ואע"ג דאסור להתרפאות בד"ת להגן שאני כדאמרי' בפ"ק דשבועות דריב"ל הוה קרי וגני כו' מיהו ק"ק מההיא דחש בראשו יעסוק בתורה כו' חש בכל גופו כו' שנא' ולכל בשרו מרפא הא אמרי' דאסור להתרפאות בד"ת ולפי דרכנו קצת ניחא דוודאי אם האדם לומד משום רפואת הנפש שהיא התורה וממילא יתרפא גוף החולה ברפואת הנפש שרי ולא אסרו להתרפאות בד"ח אלא בלוחש על המכה ולא נתכוון לרפואת הנפש כלל וכן משמע בפ' חלק דלא אסור אלא בלוחש לרפואת הגוף לבד אבל בלימוד לרפואת הנפש מועיל לרפואת הגוף ממילא ויש לדקדק גם ב"ה שאמר חש בראשו יעסוק בתורה ולא קאמר יעסוק בד"ת כמו שאנו אומרים בברכת לעסוק בד"ת ויש ליישב בזה ע"פ מ"ש במס' נדרים שהדיבור קשה לכאב עינים ולמיחוש הראש וע"כ אמר גם שא"א לעסוק בדיבור של תורה שהדיבור קשה לו מ"מ יעסוק בתורה במחשבתו או במעשה הנוגע לתורה ויהיה לו רפואת הנפש ג"כ רפואה לחולי ראשו וע"פ הדברים האלה יתפרשו דברי המאמר ולפי שמראה זו שראה משה באש השכינה בסנה היא רמז למכות מצרים כמו שיורו ע"ז כמה כתובים והיו אז גם ישראל חולי הנפש שהיו שטופים בתועבות מצרים ולא היו ראוים להנצל מחולי הגופות שבאו על המצרים כ"א למען שמו ובריתו עם האבות וע"כ היה משה מתמה מדוע לא יבער הסנה דבאיזו זכות יצילם הקב"ה וירא ה' כי סר לראות בעין שכלו מאיזה זכות ינצלו מן חולי ומכות המצריים ויאמר אנכי אלהי אביך גו' דהיינו בזכות אבות וזכות התורה שיקבלו ולפי שאילו ג' פסוקים מורים על רפואת הנפש כמ"ש לקחו אותן לרפואת הגוף לאשתא צמירתא שלג' ימים ששם ג"כ מראה השכינה על אש התולה כמ"ש ה' יסעדנו על ערש דוי והוא התימה בחולי הגוף זה מדוע לא יבער גו' כדאמרינן פרק אין בין המודר גדול נס שנעשה לחולה יותר מנס של חנניא כו' דהתם אש של הדיוט כו' וזה אש של שמים מי יכול לכבותה והיינו דמסיים ביה הכא כי היכי דחמיתיה אשתיה לחנניא כו' ואמר ולימא הכי הסנה לאו משום דגביהת כו' לפי שעיקר רפואת הנפש שישפיל אדם עצמו ויתרפא כדאמרינן במצורע ואמרו שע"כ נאמר בבשר ונרפא אם משים אדם עצמו כבשר כו' ודו"ק:

The bare-bones gist of the Maharsha is that learning Torah, and improvement of Middos, has the power not only to protect from illness, but even to cure illness. The Torah is a tavlin, not only for the spirit, but also for the body. While it is assur to "use" Torah to cure illness, it is muttar to learn Torah to improve yourself with the hope that it will also cure the illness.

7.  RNJ's answer.
First, RNJ criticized our use of the Maharsha, because it doesn't make sense for Reuven to be mispallel that Shimon's middos should improve. I responded, based on a different Maharsha by the story of Reb Meir in Brachos on 10a, that tefillos for the improvement of another person are not impossible. One can hope that he finds better friends, or experiences something that will inspire him.
Second, RNJ suggested the following.

The yesod here is that everything that happens to a person is for the good. Thus, if Hashem brings illness upon a person, this too is for his benefit. Since the illness does not bring him any physical benefit, it must be that there is a spiritual benefit i.e. the physical illness itself brings about a spiritual elevation, or "refuah" for the person's soul. (You can understand this in a number of ways, such as in terms of suffering that atones for sins, or in terms of developing positive middos like humility, etc, or in terms of the person suddenly feeling his vulnerability and needing to strengthen and deepen his connection to Hashem, etc etc) In recognition of this belief, when we daven to Hashem to heal the person's illness, we don't want to make it sound as if we are accusing Hashem of doing bad to the person by making him ill. Therefore, we incorporate into our tefillos the acknowledgement of the above-mentioned "refuas hanefesh", but we ask Hashem to change His plan so that the "refuas hanefesh" can be combined also with a refuas haguf as well. Thus the phrase "refuas hanefesh u'refuas haguf". 

I like his teretz, and I would only change his sentence " In recognition of this belief, when we daven to Hashem to heal the person's illness, we don't want to make it sound as if we are accusing Hashem of doing bad to the person by making him ill."  I would modify that by including the idea of the tefilla we say on Yom Kippur ומה שחטאתי מרק ברחמיך הרבים אבל לא על ידי יסורים וחליים רעים. Yes, suffering heals the soul by being memareik sins. We recognize that the illness was sent with a purpose, to improve the sufferer's ruchniyus. We are asking that the improvement, the necessary refu'as hanefesh, should be achieved without excessive suffering- that it should be with rachamim, not through  יסורים וחליים רעים. 

Update 2020.
I've read several articles since writing this. What I've read reinforces the idea that the nefesh is central in healing. One was an article on Reiki in The Atlantic.  Obviously Reiki is not a scientific method and is associated with foreign spiritual beliefs. But among the practitioners are individuals with estimable educations and careers in scientific medicine. The point they made was that the placebo affect is not evidence that the illness was never physical but instead points to the ability of the body to heal itself. 

The ailments that Reiki seems to treat most effectively are those that orthodox medicine struggles to manage: pain, anxiety, chronic disease, and the fear or discomfort of facing not only the suffering of illness but also the suffering of treatment. “What conventional medicine is excellent at is acute care. We can fix broken bones, we can unclog arteries, we can help somebody survive a significant trauma, and there are medicines for all sorts of symptoms,” Yufang Lin, an integrative-medicine specialist at Cleveland Clinic, told me. But medicine, she said, is less successful at recognizing the way that emotion, trauma, and subjective experience can drive physical health—and the way that they can affect recovery from acute medical care.
Lifesaving surgery is miraculous but requires drugging the body, cutting it open, altering it, stitching it back together, and then asking it to heal. Chemotherapy causes the body to fall to pieces; it can damage the brain, wreck internal organs, and destroy nerve endings, sometimes permanently. Medicine is necessary, but it can also be brutal. Lin, like several of the physicians I spoke with, emphasized that healing is something that happens within the body, enabled rather than imposed by medicine. When we are traumatized, survival is the priority and our healing mechanisms are on lockdown, Miles observed. “We have to pull out of that stress state and get into a parasympathetic-dominant state before the body is able to self-heal and actively partner with conventional medicine.”

Along the same lines is something called Resignation Syndrome, or traumatic withdrawal syndrome, in which refugee children lose the will to live and slip into essentially a catatonic state.  This is rare and tends to concentrate in geographic locations, indicating an element of intent or hysteria. But a more common phenomenon is "Psychogenic Death," a loss of the will to live that leads to physical deterioration and death. It is also called "Give-Up-Itis." This was the subject of research by Dr. John Leach in 2018.
Another example, from Dr. Simon Galperin, a Neurologist:

Human beings have more control over our physiological functioning that is generally believed. Our thoughts and attitudes have a strong effect on the health of our bodies. For example, it is well known that a strong sense of purpose has a powerful positive effect on physical health. The psychologist Viktor Frankl was convinced - based on his experiences in concentration camps during the Second World War - that a strong sense of purpose could keep people alive, and that the loss of purpose could lead to illness and death. Frankl believed that a “loss of hope” could lead to a person "giving up" and allowing themselves to die. So a person’s intention and will can certainly help to determine their survival or death. Frankl was convinced that a “loss of hope” could lead to depression and possibly even to death. There are many cases of people who are seriously ill, in the process of dying, who keep themselves alive in order to experience specific events - such as the marriage of a daughter, a final Christmas or a birthday. Once the event has passed, the person “allows’ themselves to die. 

The point is that a person can lose the desire to live and this will make his death more likely, while another's will to live might extend his life.

UPDATE February 2023.

I saw a remarkable news release about research at the Technion. The highlight of the article, to me:

Late last year, in a small, windowless microscope room, she pulled out slides from a thin black box, one by one. On them were slices of hearts, no bigger than pumpkin seeds, from mice that had experienced heart attacks. Under a microscope, some of the samples were clearly marred by scars left in the aftermath of the infarction. Others showed mere speckles of damage visible among streaks of healthy, red-stained cells.

The difference in the hearts’ appearance originated in the brain, Haykin explains. The healthier-looking samples came from mice that had received stimulation of a brain area involved in positive emotion and motivation. Those marked with scars were from unstimulated mice.

“In the beginning we were sure that it was too good to be true,” Haykin says. It was only after repeating the experiment several times, she adds, that she was able to accept that the effect she was seeing was real.

Veyeira, Beresishis 19:27. Kevias Makom for Tefilla: A Personal שער השמים

We've written about the importance of being kovei'a makom for tefilla, and its connection to fighting battles, in Parshas Mishpatim.

We only bring it up here because of the passuk here in Vayeira

  וישכם אברהם בבקר אל המקום אשר עמד שם את פני ה

from which the Gemara (Brachos 6b) derives that

כל הקובע מקום לתפילתו אלהי אברהם בעזרו, וכשמת  אומרים לו: אי עניו, אי חסיד, מתלמידיו של אברהם אבינו 

and later (7b) that

 כל הקובע מקום לתפילתו אויביו נופלים תחתיו.

We did discuss this at length in Mishpatim.  We are only adding the he'ara ketana that this makor actually deals with a tefilla that seems not to have accomplished what Avraham Avinu wanted, it was an unanswered prayer.  One might think that the ma'aleh of makom kavu'a only applies where the tefilla was effective.  Wait and see if your tefilla is answered, and if it was, that'll be your "lucky" spot for tefilla.  Butt if you davenned and weren't answered, you should davka never daven there any more.  But that is not true.  In this case, it turned out that the tefilla did not save Sedom.  And even so, Chazal tell us from our passuk that the place is miskadesh to the extent that it becomes the best place for tefilla.

So the lesson, to me, is that we aren't kovei'a makom like Bilam, who thought that a particular place has special power that will enhance the tefilla.  It seems that we learn from this that the benefit of kviyus makom has to do with the act of tefilla that connected the mispallel with the Ribono shel Olam.  The fact that the answer was "no" is irrelevant.  That place becomes, for you, something of a Shaar HaShamayim.

(If you look at the post in Mishpatim, you will see that I bring this idea, in a slightly different form, at the very end of the post, from the Satmarer Rebbe.  And from my brother.)

One more reminder- even though Talmidei Rabbeinu Yona in Brachos 3b say that the Makom of Keviyus makom for tefilla means a room, no matter where in the room, and they also say that the entire shul is a makom tefilla so it doesn't matter where you daven in the shul, we do not pasken like either nekuda.  Keviyus Makom for Tefilla means that you should daven in one shul, and within that shul, you should daven in a specific spot.
Tur OC 90-

ויקבע מקום לתפילתו שלא ישנהו אם לא לצורך גדול דאמר רב הונא כל הקובע מקום לתפילתו אלהי אברהם בעזרו. ואין די לו במה שיקבע לו בית הכנסת להתפלל בה תדיר אלא גם בבית הכנסת שקובע בה צריך שיהיה מקומו קבוע וידוע, ולא ישב היום כאן ולמחר במקום אחר, דהכי איתמר בירושלמי אמר ר' תנחום בר חייא צריך אדם לייחד לו מקום בבית הכנסת שנאמר "ויהי דוד בא עד הראש אשר ישתחוה שם", "השתחוה" לא נאמר, אלא "ישתחוה" משמע שהיה תדיר משתחוה שם

 If you find a visitor sitting there, tell him to go away.  There has to be a limit on what we learn from Avraham Avinu.
Alternatively, find a vacant seat where the guest will be left alone, and then suggest to him that he sit there.

Sources for my way of reading it:
The Tzlach in Brachos 6b:

שכיון שהתפלל שם המקום קנה קדושה,וכשמתפלל שם שוב, קדושת המקום מסייעת לו שתתקבל תפלתו.

The Meromei Sadeh there:

אל המקום אשר עמד שם בכל יום להתפלל. ושם היה מקום קדוש לראות ממנו מה שלא היה נראה בחוש הראות

However, some rishonim say that it is a behavioral thing, that when you're kovei'ah makom, you'll have more kavana there.  Like the Meiri-

ראוי לאדם לקבוע מקום לתפלתו שכל שהמקום מיוחד לו לתפלה כונתו מצויה ביותר

and the Rashba in Aggados-

 כיון שהמתפלל צריך לכוון דעותיו ולדעת לפני מי הוא עומד ולעמוד ביראה וכו'והמקום המוכן לתפילה מוסיף יראה במקומות המוכנים לעבודת השי"ת

Beshalach, Shemos 17:16. Remembering Amalek During Davening.

For Jan, of New Jersey, I will try to provide a brief summary in English of the paragraphs I cite.

The mitzva to remember the lasting damage caused by Amalek, and our hope that what they did will one day be reversed, occurs in several places in our tefilla, but one might daven his whole life and not realize what he is saying.

The passuk says ויאמר כי יד על כס י-ה מלחמה לד' בעמלק מדר דר

Rashi:

כי יד על כס יה: ידו של הקב"ה הורמה לישבע בכסאו להיות לו מלחמה ואיבה בעמלק עולמית, ומהו כס, ולא נאמר כסא, ואף השם נחלק לחציו, נשבע הקב"ה שאין שמו שלם ואין כסאו שלם עד שימחה שמו של עמלק כולו, וכשימחה שמו יהיה השם שלם והכסא שלם, שנאמר (תהלים ט ז) האויב תמו חרבות לנצח, זהו עמלק שכתוב בו (עמוס א יא) ועברתו שמרה נצח, (תהלים שם) וערים נתשת אבד זכרם המה, מהו אומר אחריו (תהלים ט ח) וה' לעולם ישב, הרי השם שלם, (תהלים שם) כונן למשפט כסאו, הרי כסאו שלם:

For there is a hand on the throne of the Eternal:  כִּי-יָד עַל כֵּס יָ-הּ. The hand of the Holy One, blessed be He, was raised to swear by His throne, to have a war and [bear] hatred against Amalek for eternity. Now what is the meaning of כֵּס [as opposed to כִּסֵא and also [why is] the Divine Name divided in half? [I.e., why is the Name יָ-הּ used instead of י-ה-ו-ה ?] [The answer is that] the Holy One, blessed be He, swore that His Name will not be complete and His throne will not be complete until the name of Amalek is completely obliterated. And when his name is obliterated, the Divine Name will be complete, and the throne will be complete....., as it is said: “The enemy has been destroyed; swords exist forever (לָנֶצַח)” (Ps. 9:7); this [who they are referring to] is Amalek, about whom it is written: “and kept their fury forever (נֶצַח)” (Amos 1:11). "And You have uprooted the cities-their remembrance is lost" (Ps. 9:7) [i.e., Amalek’s obliteration]. What does it say afterwards? “And the Lord (וַיהוה) shall sit forever” (Ps. 9:8); thus [after Amalek is obliterated] the Name is complete. "He has established His throne (כִּסְאוֹ) for judgment" (Ps. 9:8). Thus the throne is complete [i.e., thus the throne, here spelled with an “aleph,” is now complete]. — [from Midrash Tanchuma Ki Seitzei]                

According to Rashi, the three letters which are lacking from Hashem’s Name and throne are א, ו, and ה, which can be rearranged to spell the word הוא. In other words, our verse teaches that Hashem has declared a war against Amalek in every generation. When this is finally won, the letters in the word הוא will be returned to their rightful places, at which time His Name and Throne will be restored to their complete glory and His kingship will be permanently established.

The sefer Avnei Shoham (and others) uses Rashi to reveal the meaning of words we say every day in davening.  After Krias Shama, we say לדור ודור הוא קים ושמו קים וכסאו נכון ומלכותו ואמונתו לעד קימת.  "For generation after generation (Le'dor va'dor), He (Hu) is established and His Name is established and His Throne (Kis'o) is firmly set and His kingdom and faithfulness is forever established.   In light of our passuk and Rashi, we see that the words לדור ודור echo the words  מדר דר– in our passuk, and that the words הוא קים mean that the letters in the word הוא, which have been diminished in our world, will be returned to their rightful places. After these letters are restored, we will see that שמו קים וכסאו נכון – Hashem’s name and throne are established and lasting, and מלכותו ואמונתו לעד קימת – His kingdom and faithfulness will be permanent and endure forever.


A reference in Kaddish:
From Sefer HaPardes/Rashi:

בס׳ הפרדס לרש״י  פי׳ קדיש. יתגדל ויתקדש כוי,והאיך יכול להתגדל שמו של הקב׳׳ה, שמא חס ושלום כביכול חסר הוא, אין וודאי חסר הוא, כדכתיב כי יד על כס יה,נשבע הקב׳׳ה שלא יהי׳ הכסא שלם עד שימחה זכר עמלק. וכן מצינו שמו ה׳, וכשהוא אומר כס יה אינו אלא חצי ה׳ באותיות, וכמו כן קורא לכסא כס, הרי שהן חסרין אותיות, לכך אגו מתפללים יתגדל ויתקדש, כלומר יהי רצון מלפני מי שאמר והיה העולם שיגאלנו מבין האומות וימחה את זכר עמלק ויתקדש שמו להיות שלם

In Kaddish, we say "May the infinite Name be made great and sanctified...."  But is Hashem's name in need of being made great?  Yes, it is, because after the attach of Amalek Hashem swore that His Name and His Throne are not entire until the effect of Amalek is erased.  When it says Keis Kah, Kah is only half of the letters of Hashem's name, and Keis is half the letters of Kisei.  We pray that they should be made entire, meaning, that He should redeem us from our exile and erase the name of Amalek and then His Name will be holy and entire.

Tosfos Brachos 3a brings a corollary thought from the Machzor Vitri (written by Rav Simcha of Vitri, a pupil of Rashi) which explains that the congregational response to Yisgadal in kaddish, Yehei Shmei Rabba, is also a reference to this mitzva:

 ועונין יהא שמיה הגדול מבורך, מכאן יש לפתור מה שפי׳ במחזור ויטרי יהא שמיה רבה, שזו תפלה שאנו מתפללין שימלא שמו, כדכחיב כי יד על כס יה, שלא יהא שמו שלם וכסאו שלם עד שימחה זרעו של עמלק, ופירושו כך: יהא שמי׳׳ה שם יה רבא, כלומר שאנו מתפללין שיהא שמו גדול ושלם, ומבורך לעולם הוי תפלה אחרת, כלומד ומבורך לעולם הבא. וזה לא נראה, מדקאמר הכא יהא שמיה הגדול מבורך משמע דתפלה אחת היא, ואינו רוצה לומר שיהא שמו גדול ושלם, אלא יהא שמו הגדול מבורך

Tosfos quotes the Machzor Vitri as saying that the response in Kaddish, Yehei Shmei Rabbah, is a prayer that Hashem's name be made whole, and the interpretation is as follows:  The word Shmeih in Yehei Shmeih is a compound of Shem Yud Hei, which means the Name comprising the letters Yud and Hei; Rabba, may it be made whole again.  The word Mevorach that follows begins another thought.  Tosfos disagrees with this interpretation.



--A reference at the end of Davening:  (guest emendation)
This is also reflected directly in the pasuk we say at the end of Aleinu- ביום ההוא יהיה ה' אחד ושמו אחד: i.e., on the day when the הוא is restored and the Name of Hashem is complete.  On a deeper level, see the sugya Pesachim  50a on " אטו האידנא לאו אחד הוא ?"  Note carefully the reference in that gemara to וזה זכרי לדר דר and the obvious connection to the parasha of Amalek --

Using Titles and Honorifics in Tefilla אין גבהות לפני המקום

We have recently been davening for the Refuah Shleima of Gedolei Yisrael.  It is natural to identify them with honorifics, to say "Moreinu Ve'Rabbeinu Harav Hagaon."  But in fact, it is not right to do so when mention their names in Tefilla.  When davening before Hashem, we don't give kavod to fellow human beings.  This is from the Sefer Chasidim (#800), as follows:

. אדם שמתפלל על אביו אם הוא חולה לא יאמר תרפא אבא מארי או לאדוני אבא רפא כי שלמה אמר דוד אבי וכן אלישע אמר איה ה' אלהי אליהו ולא אמר אדוני  אבל עבד אברהם אמר אלהי אדוני אברהם כי לא היה  בן חורין

One who is praying for his ill father should not say "cure my father my teacher" or "my master my father," for Shlomo said "David my father," and Elisha said "where is Hashem the G-d of Eliahu," and he did not say "my master."  (He adds that this was not a problem where Eliezer referred to Avraham as Adoni, because he was a slave.  What he means with that is very unclear, and while plenty of people have talked about it, I don't love any of the pshatim I've seen.)

The Ma'avar Yabok (who was long after Reb Yehuda Hachasid; Reb Yehuda Hachasid, one of the Mekubalei Ashkenaz, died in 1217, and the Ma'avar Yabok, from Rav Aharon Brachia of Modina, an Italian Mekubal, died in 1639,)  also says this, (Sifsei Tzedek 8)

 המתפלל על אביו או על רבו לפום ריהטא נראה כי אין לומר בתחנתו רפא נא לאדוני אבי או אבא מרי או רבי ואלופי כי שלמה אמר בדברו עם ה' דוד אבי וכן אלישע אמר אלהי אליהו ולא אמר אדוני שאין גבהות לפני המקום. ואוריה נתחייב הריגה למלכות על שאמר לפני דוד ואדוני יואב ברם נראה לפי הדין שבאותם שאסור להזכיר שמם מותר לומר אבי או רבי אך לא יוסיף על זה.

He adds the phrase that is quoted by the poskim- אין גבהות לפני המקום, there is no exaltedness before G-d.

This Maavor Yabok is brought by Reb Akiva Eiger (OC 119:1) and the Chida in Birkei Yosef (YD 240:4).  The Minchas Chinuch also brings the  Maavar Yabok in Mitzva 297.  He asks, how did Elozor refer to Moshe by name (Bamidbar 31:21, ויאמר אלעזר הכהן אל אנשי הצבא הבאים למלחמה: זאת חקת התורה אשר צוה יהוה את משה)  He was his Rebbi, and it's assur to refer to a Rebbi by his name alone.  He answers that because Elazar was saying that Hashem had commanded this to Moshe, it would have been wrong to use an honorific, as the Maavar Yabok says.

It has been suggested (e.g., Reb Reuven Margolios in his notes on Sefer Chasidim) that this only applies to tefillos for a sick person, because of the condition of strict judgment- Middas Hadin- but not to general brachos or other types of tefillos.  In general tefilla, such as in Bentching, you may say "Hu yevariech es Avi Mori."   This is supported by the Ramban's mention of the minhag in Teiman; After the Rambam interceded on behalf of the Jewish community, they inserted into Kaddish the words  בחייכון וביומיכון ובחיי דרבנא משה בן מימון (as brought down by Chavel in his Kisvei HaRamban Vol I p. 341).  I don't find this convincing, because although the Sefer Chasidim said "refu'ah," his examples are from cases that have nothing to do with refu'ah.  I think that the Ramban and the Minhag of Teiman simply didn't hold like Reb Yehuda Hachasid's idea.  But Reb Shlomo Zalman Auerbach did say (brought in Or Ephraim 558) that one may use the titles Rabbeinu and Maranan when you call someone for an aliyah and in Yekum Purkan because this emphasizes that Torah she'biksav is incomplete without the mesora of Torah she'baal peh which resides in and is personified by these people.

The reason I'm writing about this now is because in the Shul where I daven during the week, the person who says the mi shebeirach for Rav Eliashiv Shlitah nebach can't help himself.  He is a talmid chacham of high achievement who learns be'hasmada and be'iyun every single day, and he is fully aware of all of these mekoros, but he just can't bring himself to say Rav Eliashiv's name without Harav.

After the discussion in the comments, and some further thought, there are some additional things that need addressing.

1.  The problem with referring to people with titles of honor in Tefilla is dual.  First, as the Maavar Yabok says, it is a chutzpa on the part of the mispallel to honor a human while talking to the Ribono shel Olam.  This focuses on the problem for the mispallel, that the mispallel is like a מורד במלכות, but it has nothing to do with the effect on the subject of the tefilla.  Second, (and this is somewhat speculative,) it is not good for the subject of the tefilla.  It could be that אין גבהות לפני המקום teaches that using titles in tefilla offends the Ribono shel Olam and nullifies any Ritzui you are looking for.  It makes the tefilla worthless.  You ask for rachamim, and you offend the Ribono shel Olam by showing honor to one of His little creations- such a tefilla will not yield any benefit at all, and maybe it is  מעורר קטיגוריא למעלה chas veshalom.  So the first comment, that said that my baal tefilla has a petur of oneis, he's right as far as the baal tefilla, but it won't help the subject of the tefilla.  The second comment, that mentioned the k'peida of some gedolim, highlights this second issue.


2.  I don't believe the minhag is like the Sefer Chasidim/Maavar Yabok/Birkei Yosef/Reb Akiva Eiger.  Maasim bechol yom is proof enough.  So what do we do with all these poskim?  Maybe we will apply them only during Shmone Esrei, when you are mamosh "עומד לפני המלך".  But stam during Tefilla, or when you're calling someone up for an aliyah, the problem is not as serious, and in those cases I don't believe we're noheig like that.  Honoring someone that you're mechuyav to honor, either because of kavod hatorah or kibbud av or hakaras hatov, that is not an affront to the Ribono shel Olam.  When you're standing in front of the Ribono shel Olam, then you have to be extremely cautious, but otherwise, its not a problem.
Alternatively, we can say that the Ramban that brings the minhag of Teiman to say ובחיי דרבנא משה in kaddish contradicts these shittos, and we can do like the Ramban.

3.  Even if you want to say we do hold like the osrim, I would say that we should limit that to tefilla for Refu'ah.  When you're asking for refu'ah, you are focusing on human helplessness and our dependence for our very breath on the chesed of the Ribono shel Olam.  For such a tefilla, assertions of chashivus are truly incongruous and counterproductive.  But in other cases, I don't think our minhag is to worry about that.

So, in short, the additional points are:
1.  Those that prohibit honorifics in tefilla do so for two reasons: it is a sin for the person saying the tefilla, and it is not healthy for the person for whom you're davening.
2.  I believe our minhag is to not worry about this prohibition, or, if we do, we only are makpid in Shmoneh Esrei.
3.  Alternatively, maybe it's only something to worry about in tefillos for refuah for a choleh, but not when you call up for aliyos or other tefillos.

Massei. Sending Gifts to the Internees of the Arei Miklat

Makkos 11a– the Kohein Godol’s mother used to send packages of food to the internees so that they shouldn’t be mispallel for her son’s death. R Meir Zvi Bergman in his Sha'arei Orah II, pp.215-217 asks, how would this help? Would nice food replace freedom and make imprisonment tolerable?

He answers that the packages would make them sympathize a little with the Kohein Godol’s mother, and so their tefillos would not be 'b’leiv sholeim,’ their prayers would not be with a whole heart. There is something called tefillah b’leiv shaleim, and there is something else called tefillah that is not b’leiv shaleim. A tefillah b’leiv shaleim is a powerful thing; but even a little dilution makes a critical, an essential difference. When a person is praying that someone should die, sympathy with his victim is a distraction. His sympathy would compromise his ‘yichad leiv.’

Also, see Mo’ed Kotton 18b: Ein nos’in nashim b’moeid, but if he’s afraid that someone else will get her, he can be me’areis. Gemora asks, but “arba’im yom...bas ploni l’ploni,” so why is there any concern? The Gemora answers that there is a concern that ‘shemo yikd’menu acher b’rachamim,” But it’s bashert! The Ribono Shel Olam was machriz! The answer is that a tefillah can change the course of history.

So we see that tefillah is a very powerful thing; it can change a gzeirah of a zivug, it can cause a Kohen Godol to die prematurely. And we have the opportunity to do this three times a day. But for tefillah to be this powerful, it requires a leiv shaleim, it requires yichad leiv. That is the tremendous avodoh of tefillah that we learn from the Gemara in Makkos. So the next time you daven, try to focus, try not to be distracted, and try to really understand what you are saying, and honestly and sincerely accept Hashem’s willingness to hear and give effect to your
tefillos.

A friend of mine who lives in Yerushalayim heard me deliver this drashah, and he made a wonderful addition. He said that he always wondered why it is that people’s klalos seem to be fulfilled more often than their brachos. Now, he said, he understands it: because when a person curses someone, he does it “mit zein gantzen hartz.”

This reminds me of the very German proverb, (I normally wouldn't quote it in German, but, as you will see, this is a saying that really sounds at home in German,) “Schadenfreude ist die schönste Freude, denn sie kommt von Herzen”: "Gloating over another's misfortune is the most superb kind of joy, since it comes directly from the heart."

How to Improve Our Avodas Hashem- The Chasidim Harishonim

I have been inspired to offer, in my own humble way, a little service to Klal Yisroel. To some extent, I am motivated to do this by my recent experience in davenning for the amud, since I recently became an aveil. I hope this will help others who find themselves at the amud, and even, with a little mazal, the tzibbur as a whole.

The Gemara in Nedarim (20b) says that some great tzadikkim of old were so pure and holy and so scrupulously avoided any taint of the yetzer hora, that when they engaged in marital relations, tashmish hamittah, they did it‘ke’ilu kefa’o sheid,’ unwillingly, as if they were forced by a demon. They wished they didn't have to be there, and they finished as quickly as possible, with no enjoyment and as little emotional involvement as possible. It was a burdensome duty, and certainly not something that they would dwell upon before, during, or after.

We don’t have such great tzadikkim anymore, but we do have an opportunity to emulate their holy behavior to a lesser degree, a zeicher ledavar. We can DAVEN ke'ilu ke'fao sheid! We can learn to proudly say (more or less) every word and finish shacharis in 18 minutes, sort of like a tobacco auction. The people at tobacco auctions understand what is being said, and I am sure that Hashem will understand what we are saying as well. Except for Aseres Ye’mei Tshuvah, how important is it, really, to have kavanah (see Nedarim 49 and Tosfos there d'h Ke'mahn)? And what right do you have to kvetch when there are people that need to get out and do more important things?

So, here are some suggestions.

Consecutive words that share an ending and beginning letter should be run together.

There should be no pause between different thoughts or themes. (Good example:
Shoveir oyevim umachni'a zeidim ahl hatzadikim v'ahl hachasidim.)

Don’t pause for baruch hu uvaruch shemo. (The Briskers, following the Gaon, don’t say it during chazaras hashatz anyway, so it’s good to be machmir all over.)

Come to think of it, don’t pause for the tzibbur to answer Amein either.

Take a quick deep breath before each paragraph so you can finish it ‘be’neshima achas.’

With time and practice, you can learn to vocalize during inhalation, though it might sound strange. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pulmonic_ingressive

Don’t ever, ever use a tune. Droning really communicates how humble you are.

Don't worry about kavanah in your silent shmoneh esrei, because for the shli'ach tzibur, the shmoneh esrei you repeat out loud is the more important one (O'C 126:4).

Don't worry about kavanah in the shmone esrei you repeat out loud, because, after all, you already said a silent shmoneh esrei.


There's no need to thank me. I do this out of love; Knowing that I helped someone have a second cup of coffee, or beat rush hour, is reward enough for me.

For aspirational purposes:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3882869677481343971&q=%22fast+talker%22&total=70&start=0&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=1

Vayigash, 46:1. Be’er Shova; Davenning in a Dance Hall

Yaakov intentionally went to to be makriv korbonos specifically in Be’er Shova . Evidently he felt that there was some special advantage in doing the hakrovoh there.

Reb Moshe, in OC I : 31, regarding renting a building for the yomim noro’im that is used as a dance hall, says: The same way that we see according to Tosfos that it is better to daven alone in a Beis Medrash instead of with a minyan in a Beis Knesses, (and even according to the Rambam that the precedence of a Beis Medrash is only to be machri’a over rov om in the Beis Knesses but not if there is no minyon at all in the Beis Knesses,) it is clear that the place makes a difference in whether the tefilla will be accepted. So, he says, a person that davens in a place that is a makom tiflus like a dance hall, even if he davens with a minyan, the Shechina will not come there, and his tefillos will not be accepted.

This is a tremendous ho’ora, because it says, le’halocho, that the place that you daven affects whether your tefillos will be accepted, and certainly the degree of rotzon with which they will be viewed by Hashem. And even though tfilla with a minyan is niskabel, it will not be miskabel if you are davenning in a mokom tiflus, and you’re better off davenning alone, without a minyon.

It is worth remembering that Chazal refer to the city of Shchem as being a place that is muchon l’pur’onus ever since the events that took place with Dinah. Rav Shimon Krasner in his Nachlas Shimon, Melochim I page 255 brings from R Chaim Falagi that it was the sin of Shchem that made a permanent and indelible roshem that spoiled everything that took place there in the future, as we find that it was from there that Yosef was sold and Malchus Beis Dovid was cut in half.

R’ Moshe makes several additional points:
•That this psak is specific to the case of renting a place that remains kovu’a for tiflus. If, however, you are buying the place and changing its kvius, then there is no problem. Even according to the Mogen Avrohom in 154 that prohibits a place that was once kovu’ah for avodah zoroh that’s because of “m’issi,” it retains a stigma, that’s only AZ, not tiflus.
•That this is only a problem if it is kovu’a for tiflus, not if it is an occasional use.
•That this is only a problem if the kvius was done by the owners/legal users. On the other hand, if the tiflus was a hidden and illicit activity that was not approved of by the regular users or owners, it does not have an effect. He supports this from the B’er Heiteiv in 151:1 from the R’eim, where the shamosh was caught with a young lady in shul, it does not affect the kedusha of the shul.
•There is also a teshuva in YD where he says that one may not make a separate minyan to accommodate two chiyuvim, because of the din of rov om. If the place where they make the separate minyan is not a mokom tefilla kovu’a, ein tzorich lomar it would not be muttar.
And the tfillos of Avrohom and Yitzchok definitely make a difference in the place, because their tfilla was the proper and authorized use of the place. Also, kedusha has more kvius than tum’ah, so a single event can leave a permanent roshem.

So the people who go to a yeshiva on Yomim Nora’im are right, and the ma’alo of a yeshiva is definitely greater than the inyon of makom kavu’a or rov om.

So, now that we know that the mokom is important in the ritzui of the tefilla, we understand how it showed kibbud av when Yakov went to Be’er Shova. As noted below here in the discussion about Kibud of a Grandfather, from Rabbi Zupnik, Yakov could have passed through the place where Avrohom brought korbonos, but instead he went through Be’er Shova where Yitzchok had built a mizbeiyach. This showed respect for the hechsher makom that Yitzchok accomplished.



People like to say it doesn’t matter where you daven, as long as you have a minyon the Shchina comes, so what else matters. But we see from here that it does matter. It’s not black and white. Davenning in a place with more kedusha is a better davenning and it is accepted more readily by Hashem.

Now, it is always entertaining, but usually futile, to try to figure out which shul has better people, because we have no way of assessing people’s madreigah. And it probably is not helpful to say that you won’t daven in a certain place because “so-and-so the sheigitz davens there.” But we can safely say that just as davening alone in your house is better than davening with a minyon in a dance hall, a yeshiva beis medrash is probably a better place to daven than most shuls, and we probably can make even closer distinctions, like not davening where there is wanton and unprotested talking during davening.

The main lesson is that it is not only your davening that matters. You tefila does not stand in isolation. It is a private conversation between you and God, but it is also a part of a whole group of tfillos. It is also the tfilla of the tzibur, the tfilla of the building, the ground underneath you, and the echoes of the tfillos that you davenned there in the past, and even whatever else happened there in the past. As it says in Chabakuk 2:11, Ki even mikir tiz’ok, v’chofis mei’eitz ya’anenoh.